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Keeping Up With The Kardashians: Season 6: Episode 9: “Talk To My Agent”

This week’s episode started with Kris going for her daily visit to Kourtney and Scott’s, to do what else but annoy them. Her first target, Scott. Scott comes home at 3 o’clock from work and Kris has a big problem with that. She tells him to go back to work and find something else to do.  Kris apparently thinks Scott should be holding down a 9-5.  She clearly isn’t that big of a proponent of 9-5’s since no one in her family has one.  But the pleblians of the world, that’s you Scott, need to be at work from 9-5 to be worth anything.  Scott calmly leaves the kitchen to avoid getting into it with Mama Kris.

Kim heads over to Kris and Bruce’s house to talk about her recent nonperformance at a Prince concert. Kim was called up on stage, but then given the boot because she wasn’t dancing. How embarassing, we thought Kim wad perfect and could do no wrong. Khloe tries to get Kim to loosen up and dance, but Kim stands her ground justifying the situation by saying she’s not a dancer.

Back to Kourtney and Scott’s, where Kendall and Kylie are hanging out. The Jenner girls talk about their work schedules and how Kris is slacking as their manager. Scott says he would love to be their manager.  He has the chance to represent the newest dark haired reality TV sensations and piss off Kris at the same time?!  He’s all in!  After all, Scott thinks the younger girls are the stars and future breadwinners of the family. Kim, Khloe and Kourtney are getting to be old and grey.  So Scott and the girls come up with a joke to play on Kris. They will tell her that Scott is going to be their new manager.

Kourtney and Kim make an appearance on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show where Kim talks about her awesomely amazing relationship with fiance Kris Humphries. But then Ryan mentions Kim getting kicked off Prince’s stage, and Kim continues to stick to her story, she’s an awful dancer.

Back at the Jenner house, Kylie and Kendall try to figure out the perfect time to play their joke on Kris. The girls tell Kris why they think Scott should manage them, and they find the most support with Bruce.  It’s no surprise.  He doesn’t have the courage to strip Kris of any of his power, so if another man is willing to do it, he’s all in! Kris is not amused and is goes straight to the source of the problem and gets Scott on the horn. The girls fill Bruce in on their little joke, but that he doesn’t think is such a good idea.

In true Kris fashion, she shows up unannounced at Kourtney and Scott’s house to confronts him. The phone call wasn’t enough for her.  When Scott sees how crazy Kris is getting, he tells her it was a joke. Kris takes it one step further. Instead of just having fun with it Kris starts insulting Scott calling him a lazy, entitled, bad boyfriend just like old times and he kicks her out of his house.

Kim goes to a dance class to learn some moves. Watching her try to dance is definitely very amusing, but we can’t help but feel bad for Kim when she forgets the routine. Dancing is clearly not in Kim’s future so we don’t think she’ll be going back for a second class.

Kim meets up with Prince’s ex wife to talk about what happened at his concert. Kim explains her phobia of performing in front of people to her, which is ironic considering she’s in front of a camera 24/7.

Scott tells Kourtney that she needs to tell Kris to stop coming over unannounced. He is having a serious problem with the way she treats him. Kourtney thinks he owes her an apology for playing a stupid, childish joke on her, but Scott definitely has a point when he says Kris is at fault here too.

Scott goes over to Kris’s to talk about their ongoing issues. Scott tells Kris he’s sorry about the joke, but he feels like Kris is very insensitive to him and says a lot of hurtful things. The two apologize and hug it out. Yes, two of the most stubborn Kardashian adjacents both apologized.  All is well again in the Kardashian family.

Later, the whole fam goes out to dinner where Kim finally gets over her fears and joins her sisters and shows off her dance moves.

Kris Jenner Gets Potty Trained

Keeping Up With The Kardashians: Season 6: Episode 7: “The Have and Have Nots”

This episode aired a little while ago, but is still worthy of a recap nonetheless.  It starts out at the Jenner household in Calabasas where Kendall and Kylie are showing off their jump roping skills to big sisters Khloe and Kourtney. Kris Jenner comes in to give it a shot and gives the girls a good laugh. Kris apparently peed her pants in the process, and Khloe and Kourtney think she should get it checked out by a doc.

Kris, Kendall, Kylie, and Bruce sit down for a homemade family dinner, prepared by a chef of course, but it is disrupted by Kylie’s desperate attempt to leave and go to the movies with her friends.  Such a teenage move. Bruce and Kris try t0 crack the whip and tell her not to go but kids are King in this house.

Kris, Kourtney, and Khloe go do some credit card damage at Alice and Olivia, where Khloe gives Kris a very hard time about her bladder control, or lack there of. Khloe’s plan of making fun of Kris until she goes to the doctor doesn’t seem to be working yet.

Bruce heads to his favorite weekend hotspot- the Heli Park. A park where Bruce and other helicopter enthusiasts go to fly their high tech toys. But Bruce’s Saturday quickly turns sour when he gets a phone call from the credit card company regarding recent charges. Bruce immediately knows it’s Kylie and Kendall who stole his card to do some shopping. As if we all haven’t done this before. When he confronts the girls they act like it’s no big deal and think Bruce is over reacting. Bruce tells them to return the items stat, but Kyle tells Kendall to relax because Kris will let them keep it.  And we all know when the kids aren’t busy running the house, Kris is.  Still, Bruce wants to teach these little princesses the value of a dollar.

On to the little lovebirds Kris Humphries and Kim K. Kris takes Kim to a very ‘romantical’ spot on the beach to have some alone time. Kim, dressed in a black cocktail dress and heels, wasn’t exactly in proper beach attire, but she’s always gotta be dressed to impress so she can look “perfect” at all times.  Her words, not ours.

The other Kris, Khloe, Bruce, Kourtney, and Scott go out to dinner for a fun Indian inspired meal. Kris talks about an infamous tape she made years ago with Bruce.  It now becomes clear where Kim got in the spirit to make her popular adult tape. Next Kris has to go to the bathroom but Khloe is not letting her. Kris finally breaks free and heads to the ladies room.

The next day, or at least the next scene, Kris and Bruce meet up with Kim and Kourtney for lunch. Kourtney immediately brings up Kris’s bladder problem and asks her if she’s gotten it checked out yet. Kris finally admits that she might have a problem and agrees to go to the doctor. Bruce talks about Kylie and Kendall and how he wants to teach them some discipline and teach them about money and how priveledged they are. Bruce comes up with the plan to take Kendall and Kylie to a mission to show them what poverty looks like. Kourtney agrees to go, and thinks Scott should learn this stuff too.

Kourtney goes with Kris to the doctor and Kris begins to get upset that she really can’t defy time, and she is getting older no matter how much money she makes. The doctor tells her to do kegel exercises to um tighten things up. But Kris finds out that it’s normal for her to be having this problem, especially after pushing out 6 kids. Kris demonstrates her exercises for Kourtney on the way home and Kourtney joins in with some kegels of her own.  Only the Kardashians do family kegels and on national television no less.  Is nothing sacred?

Kylie and Kendall arrive at the homeless shelter and are not happy about it. They couldn’t look more uncomfortable, but they start to warm up to the kids. Kourtney shows up and the girls get down to work. They start to prepare to serve food and begin to realize how lucky they are to have a private chef. The girls and Bruce go visit one of the girls rooms and it was definitely an eye opening experience for them. The girls make some friends and definitely understand what Bruce was trying to show them. Success!

Later, Kris shows up at home with her new business venture. She got offered the position of the official spokesperson for an adult diaper brand since she seems to have a leakage problem and all. Leave it to Kris to turn this embarrassing problem into a money making deal. In the end, the Kardashians always “win”.

You Can’t Always Blame It On The Alcohol

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Keeping Up With The Kardashians: Season 6: Episode 11: “Thicker Than Water”

Taking a break from worrying about whether or not Kourtney and Scott will get married, this episode focus’s on Rob’s issues. Remember the Kardashians do have a brother.

We start out this episode with Kylie and Kendall Jenner testing Bruce’s hearing while Kris supervises. Kris tries to talk Bruce into getting his hearing checked out telling him how sad he would be if he could never hear her voice again.. Probably not the best plan of attack Kris.

Rob, Kim, and Khloe are in Vegas to celebrate Rob’s 24th birthday at The Mirage. Kim tells Rob that Kourtney’s feelings were a little hurt when he didn’t invite her along for the trip, but Rob says Kourtney has a baby.  People with babies don’t get invited places. Kim asks Rob why he hasn’t seen Mason in a while, and Rob says he doesn’t see Mason or Kourtney because of Scott. It’s always because of Scott.  Rob lives with Lamar and Khloe now and loves how Lamar treats Khloe, and we all know that hasn’t been the case for Kourtney and Scott.

Back to Calabasas. Khloe visits Kris and Bruce to give them their weekly verbal spankings.  She talks to Bruce about his hearing issue. Khloe does an at home treatment on Bruce called a “Harmony Cone”, which involves a plate and burning candle stuck in Bruce’s ear. The amount of ear wax that came out of Bruce’s hear should have helped his hearing, but the fam still thinks he should go to a doctor other than physician Khloe.

Kourtney pays Khloe a visit with the hopes of running into Rob, but Rob is too hungover to see his sister. Kourtney takes matters into her own hands and bombards Rob in his room and definitely rubs him the wrong way. Kourtney thinks Rob needs to spend less time partying, and more time with his family. Little does she know he is spending time with his family, just not hers.

Kris comes home to find Bruce there without Kylie and Kendall. Kris told him to pick the girls up from school early and he surprisingly didn’t hear her. He also forgot to pick up the dog who was getting his hair and nails done along with a massage at the salon.  Kris is fed up with Bruce’s hearing, or lack there of.

Rob makes his first visit to Kourtney and Scott’s new house, to see Kourtney and Mason. Rob complains about his stomach hurting and Kourtney immediately blames it on the alcohol. After Kourtney gives him a hard time about living off of Khloe and Lamar, Rob finally tells Kourtney that he doesn’t come see Kourtney because of Scott. Rob doesn’t like being around Scott and thinks he is a negative influence. So Kourtney kicks Rob out.  This is so melodramatic and concocted.

Bruce finally goes to see a doctor about his hearing. He blocks out all of the Kris voices that we know must run through his head all day and tries to focus on  the hearing test so he won’t have to wear a hearing aide. The results show that his minor hearing loss is totally normal for his age. With the Dr.’s help, Bruce comes to the conclusion that he has a minor case of selective hearing, especially when it comes to Kris’ nagging. Bruce shows Kris his doctor’s note. Kris is less than amused when Bruce tries to explain that his hearing loss is because of her.

Kim comes in to save the day at the Jenner household. She informs the fam that Rob’s stomach pains are more serious than anyone thought and he needs to go to the hospital. Kris gets her tennis shoes on, picks Rob up from Khloe’s and takes him to the hospital. Rob wasn’t faking it, and has to get his appendix taken out. Guess it wasn’t the alcohol Kourtney.

Rob comes out of surgery and is perfectly healthy again! Kris heads home while Rob spends the night in the hospital. Kris tells Bruce that he hurt her feelings earlier when he said he tunes her out. They talk it out and both understand where the other is coming from.

Kourtney visits Rob in the hospital and apologizes to Rob for not believing he was actually sick. Rob vows to see Mason more, and won’t let his dislike for Scott get in the way of that.  Kumbaya.

No One Fights at ‘Mob Wives’ Reunion

#SmallScreen

Mob Wives: Season 1: The Reunion

After the explosive season finale of Mob Wives, we’re shocked Bravo could even have these four ladies in the same room. The reunion marked the first time all the women were together since the infamous rooftop brawl between Karen Gravano and Drita d’Avanzo.

Reunion host Wendy Williams didn’t waste anytime getting into it with the women, noting how obvious the tension was in the room. Wendy mentioned the negative feedback the show was getting, and how Italian American’s were embarrassed by the way these women were portraying themselves. Drita thinks it’s ridiculous that people are offended by how she lives her life, saying it isn’t any of their business.

Next Wendy talked about another famous mobwife, Victoria Gotti, Renee Graziano got visibly annoyed. Maybe there’s some unfinished business between these two mob wives. Victoria made several comments to the press calling the show scripted. All four women shot down that accusation, and we’ll definitely take their word. You can’t make this stuff up.

Wendy then asks the question that most viewers, including us, have been wondering since the first episode. How do these unemployed ladies live so comfortably when their husbands, or fathers are in jail?  Carla Facciolo explains that even when her husband Joe was in prison, she always worked, but when she had kids she had to work part time. Karen points to her paycheck from the show which is decent, her book, and a day spa she’s owned for 7 years. Renee doesn’t want to talk about her finances at all, and thinks people need to mind their own business.

Next, Wendy asks the women if there is still Mob out in Staten Island, as if the women are going to just tell Wendy Williams where their hideouts and meeting places are on national television. All the women play dumb and act like they have no clue. Which maybe they don’t, but Renee’s smirk says otherwise.

The women take a look back at Karen return back to Staten Island, and more specifically, her not so warm welcome from Renee. The two women have major family beef because of their fathers, and nothing is thicker than mob blood. Renee says she was very unhappy when Karen decided to return to Staten Island.  In fact, Renee and her father don’t have much of a relationship anymore because of her doing the show and being friends with Karen.  Airing the Mob’s dirty laundry on a Vh1 show probably wasn’t what he was expecting while he’s behind bars, so we can’t say we’re suprised.  Renee says she has a tremendous amount of respect for Karen now.

Karen says her father Sammy “The Bull” Gravano does in fact watch the show while he’s in prison. He doesn’t always like what happens, but he hates that people judge his daughter for his mistakes. Aww. Carla’s Joe and Drita’s Lee have no interest in watching the show.

We then take a look back at Drita and Lee’s relationship. Drita starts crying immediately talking about Lee’s infidelity. Drita and Lee aren’t speaking at all, and she filed for divorce, which isn’t finalized yet. But Drita wasn’t done there. She confronted the other woman, but not face to face because her emotions could have taken over her. That ‘other woman’ should be thanking God everyday that Drita didn’t want to meet with her face to face. Renee puts in her two cents and says Lee, along with all these other cheating mob husbands are ***holes. The women say they all want to date normal men, but they think all the normal guys are scared of them. Maybe someone will invent an online dating site for women previously married to mob men looking for love with a non-mobster.

After the break, Wendy asks the women for their feelings about ‘Gumars’, the women who sleep with married mobsters. The Italian word for ‘the other woman’. Renee calls them whore’s, and tells them to stay away from married men. Karen explains that these women are intrigued by the mob lifestyle and the power these men have and that’s why they choose to sleep with them.  So the mov wife culture is just like politics or sports, where there are powerful men with groupies. Carla talks about finding out Joe was cheating on her, and says she decided to stop waiting for him to be released from prison.

Renee starts clapping when Carla says she and her boyfriend broke up, but not because she’s getting back with Joe. Wendy gets into the fight between Renee and Carla about her then boyfriend and his touchy feely ways. Carla’s been pretty calm throughout the show and Karen says that it was just the wheaties that made Carla be able to stand up to Renee that night.

The women examine the evidence against Carla’s ex and talk about the times he got a little too close to the other women’s rear ends. Renee and Carla clearly don’t agree on what is appropriate behavior, but Renee definitely has a point when she says, ‘if he’s going to touch us in front of you, what’s he gonna do behind your back’. Carla does not believe Renee and Karen when they say he’s touched them. Renee seems pretty believable, especially when she swears on her sons eyes that he grabbed her ***, as well as Karen’s.

On to the infamous book. There’s something with the housewives and their books.  Don’t get between the two. First Danielle Staub, now Karen Gravano. The fight between Karen and Drita puts The Real Housewives of New Jersey table flip to shame. Karen tells Drita on why she gave her the chapter, and explains Karen says that her book is a lot bigger than Lee. The two were involved 13 years ago, and the book is about Karen’s life as a mobster’s daughter, not about her relationship with Lee. If there isn’t anything for Drita to hide, she shouldn’t be so concerned about the book. Karen hadn’t even decided if Lee was definitely going to be in the book. But given the success of the show, which the book played a huge role in, Lee will be in the book.  Karen says she is not happy that Drita and Lee are getting divorced.

Now the moment we’ve all been waiting for. Unseen footage of the rooftop fight between Drita and Karen. Renee and Carla act like referees, and tried to split up the women. Drita talks about how she blacked out during the fight and doesn’t remember exactly what happened. Karen talks about her relationship with Lee and all their infidelities. Then Karen drops a bomb and says that Drita has done this before. Drita warns Karen to drop the subject because she knows too much. Drita makes it clear that if Karen were in her life at the time that she first got with Lee, she wouldn’t have done it in the first place. Karen laughs it off and is sticking to her story that she and Drita were girls at the time. Karen’s calm approach does make her story seem like the more valid one, but we guess we’ll never know the whole truth.

Wendy then takes a look back our resident drama queen Renee. Even with all of Renee’s over the top crying, she is definitely the most amusing part of this show. She says she is kind of dating someone, but it’s not serious yet. She talks about her knifestyles, and what plastic surgery she’s had done. She plans to have a tummy tuck, and has had a few other operations in the past including a breast reduction and a nose job. Renee is back to styling rappers and calls 50 Cent a good friend of hers.

Karen then deals with the viewers’ opinions about her parenting. As we know, Karen left her daughter with her father in Arizona while she was filming the show, and many viewers had a negative opinion about that. But Karen said she feels at home in Staten Island, and is torn on where she will be next.

Final words from the women consist of Karen wishing things were different with Drita, Carla regretting the fight she had with Renee, Drita regretting the fight she had with Karen and if she could go back in time she would have handled getting with Lee differently, and Renee regretting nothing besides not losing weight before filming started. Season 2 of Mob Wives starts in the fall.  This show was basically renewed after the first super successful episode.

Kourtney Will Be the Unwed Sister Forever

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Keeping Up With The Kardashians : Season 6: Episode 10: “Out Of Wedlock”

We’re back with everyone’s favorite crazy family, the Kardashians. This week’s episode starts out with Rob Kardashian having an interesting itch on his rear end.  It wouldn’t be the Kardashians if an extremely in appropriate conversation didn’t ensure.  After Rob proceeded to rub his but on the encounter searching for relief, somehow turns the conversation into whether or not Rob and Khloe’s hubby Lamar Odom could do porn. Rob thinks he could, and Lamar thinks he could definitely do porn.  Forget the old street name + your pet’s name= your porn name.  Lamar says his name would be ‘Lefty Lamar’, for reasons that no one other than Khloe wants to know about.

Kris and Kourtney head to a nursery to look for flowers for Kourtney and her baby daddy Scott Disick’s house. When Kris mentions making some changes to Kourtney’s guest room, Kourtney brings up the possibility of turning that into a nursery for the next baby. But mama Kris thinks she should be married before having another child. Kourtney tries to ignore Kris’ comments but we all know it’s impossible to ignore Kris. Getting married is apparently not on Kourtney’s mind, so she tells Kris she can wheel down the aisle if that’s how long it takes for her and Scott to get married.

Scott meets with his therapist where he talks about his relationship with Kourtney, and how she wants to expand their family. Even though Mason is arguably the cutest celeb kid ever, Scott doesn’t want to have another baby. He talks about how he feels left out of the equation sometimes because it seems like it’s just Kourtney and Mason and he’s jealous. Never mind the fact that he’s not officially a part Kourtney’s family since they’re not married.  So, he could really be cut from the equation at any time.  Shockingly, Scott and Kris seem to be on the same page for once. Both pictured that Kourtney and Scott would get married, then have children. But when Scott’s plan to propose to Kourtney last season failed, the idea of marriage has been on the back burner.

Kris meets up with her long time friend Pastor Brad, who has asked Kris to become an ordained minister so she can help officiate his upcoming wedding. Kris gets Pastor Brad on her side when it comes to Kourtney and Scott, obviously, because he is a pastor and all. Both agree that getting them hitched like yesterday, is the right thing to do. So Kris heads over to Kourtney’s to share the news. Kourtney and Kim would rather spend their time making fun of Kris’ sunglasses than talk about why Scott and Kourtney aren’t hitched.

Kim points out that Kris didn’t even like Scott two seconds ago but now she wants them to get married so badly. Scott has “changed” according to the Kardashians, but it feels like Kris wants this wedding more for herself than for Kourtney’s family. Kourtney continues to tell her mom that getting married isn’t something she wants right now. But Kris gets another person on her side when Kim says that she doesn’t really understand why Kourtney doesn’t want to get married and thinks they should. Shocking, Kim wants someone other than herself to get married.  When Kourtney says she and Kim will just be unmarried sisters forever, Kim shuts her down saying, “I’m not going to stay unmarried forever.”  Kourtney, this is Kim you were talking to.  She’s been planning her wedding since she popped out the womb.

Khloe is at home sick with a cold and Bruce brings her some chicken noodle soup. He tells Khloe how Kris is becoming a pastor.  After Pastor Brad’s wedding, she plans to get Kourtney and Scott hitched. But what Kris keeps forgetting is the small fact that Kourtney doesn’t want to get married.

Kris then vents to another friend about how she hates that Kourtney and Scott aren’t married and trying to have another child. This horse has been dead for an eternity.  And Kris is still beating it. Kris’ friend is definitely on her side and said she would be so upset if her daughter was trying to have another child with someone who she wasn’t married to.  Not to mention Kourtney and Scott are already sleeping in separate beds.  They  might as well be married.

Kris then conveniently asks Kourtney and Scott to be her pretend man and wife so she can practice her part for Pastor Brad’s ceremony. Kris then brings up the marriage issue again, and Kourtney has had enough. She understands her mom’s points of tradition but doesn’t care what she thinks. Kris wants Kourtney and Scott to follow tradition and doesn’t understand why Kourtney is making it such a big deal. After Kourtney tells her mom to butt out of her business, and to “shut the **** up”, yes, to “shut the **** up, no exaggeration, Kris storms off and rightfully so. Scott seems surprised that Kourtney said those words to their mother, but he’s the only one.  Kourtney doesn’t need to do what her mom says, but she needs to understand where she is coming from and respect it.

Kourtney starts to vent about the situation to her family but Kim steps in and tells Kourtney she actually agrees with Kris. Kourtney doesn’t want to hear it and leaves with Scott. The couple talks about the situation, and Scott all of a sudden is on the same page as Kourtney. But he also worries that Kourtney sees their relationship as something temporary, and doesn’t see herself ending up with him.

Kris goes to Bruce and expects him to be on her side, but Bruce warns Kris to stop meddling inKourtney’s business. Kim and Kourtney get ready for Pastor Brad’s wedding, and Kim asks Kourtney why she doesn’t want to marry Scott. Kourtney of course doesn’t want to talk about it. But Kourtney finally gives in and explains that she wants to make sure Scott has changed before they take the next step. Kourtney claims that she doesn’t want Mason to go through what she went through when her parents got divorced.

Kourtney shouldn’t have to get married if she doesn’t want to, but her reasoning is so flawed.  It’s as if she thinks Mason will only “go through” it if she and Scott are married and divorced.  It’s as if a kid brought into the world out of wedlock and sees his parents break up is any different.  We guess that will make him feel all warm and fuzzy inside?  Kim suggests that Kourtney talk to Kris and explain herself, and maybe then Kris will leave her alone.

It’s the day of Pastor Brad’s wedding and Kris has some serious nerves about helping in the ceremony. We finally take a break from worrying about Scott and Kourtney’s non-existent wedding, to focus on two people who do want to be together forever. Held in Bruce and Kris’ entry way of their mansion, the ceremony was short and sweet and Kris did a great job. That break only lasted for a hot second, as Kris was right back at annoying the heck out of them. Kourtney looks like she is about to explode at her mom when she continues to make side comments about her getting married. Kris should shake up her game plan, because so far her over the top meddling is only pushing Kourtney and Scott further away from walking down the aisle.

Kourtney and Kris finally have a minute alone to talk about the marriage situation. Kris is visibly upset by Kourtney not wanting to get married, but Kris’ tears didn’t work and Kourtney stormed out again. For now, the marriage situation is not on Kourtney and Scott’s mind and hopefully it won’t have to be on ours in the future episodes.  One Kardashian wedding is quite enough.

Lone-Lee

Mob Wives: Season 1: Episode 10: “Rumble on the Rooftop”


When we said the season finale of Mob Wives was gonna be explosive that was an understatement. The episode starts with Karen Gravano at her apartment, on the phone with her boyfriend. They chat about the book she’s writing, but the conversation then quickly turns to her issues with Drita d’Avanzo. Drita thinks that Karen wants to bash Lee in her book, but Karen claims she has no reason to. Breaking up with someone never gives you reason to bash them.  Karen then questions if living in Staten Island is the best thing for her, her daughter, and her boyfriend, who believe it or not seems pretty normal.

Next, our favorite drama queen Renee Graziano, visits her therapist to talk about her life, and her ex-husband Junior not being a part of it anymore. Renee claims she is “centered” and has learned how to control her emotions. It will take a few more lessons with her therapist to calm her down.

Carla Facciolo talks to her husband, and checks up on him and the kids. It was their first time sleeping over at their father’s since hes been out of prison. We can’t say we blame her for being a little nervous.

Drita gets a visit from her longtime friend Nicole and of course talks about the book. Drita hasn’t read the book but she is pissed that hes “in it”. Drita should read the chapter first before she jumps to conclusions. But this makes for great “reality” TV. Drita explains that Karen is running her mouth telling people that Drita started dating Lee less than a year after he broke up with Karen. Drita claims that she started dating Lee years after Karen and him broke up, and they apparently hadn’t even been talking during that time. As if the time period is really the issue here.

Drita then drops a bomb and reveals that Karen hooked up with Drita’s boyfriend while Karen and Lee were still together! Drita’s had enough of Karen trying to make it seem like Drita betrayed her, and she’s about to go on enemy lines.  You just couldn’t make this stuff up.  This is one reality show that could really replace the soap operas.  After all, these ‘wives recycle men like them.

Renee and Karen meet up for dinner where Renee explains that she doesn’t understand why Karen even cares what Drita thinks about the book, and why they are even friends at all. Renee suggests that the two women need to spend a weekend alone, figure out their s*** and either one of them comes back, or both of them do.  A total soap opera!  One may mysteriously disappear from the face of the earth, only to resurface seasons later.

Drita then calls Carla and asks her to meet her for a drink. Drita is clearly stressed about something. Drita explains that she went into a hair salon and instead of a new ‘do she came out with the awful truth that her husband Lee cheated on her. And brought their baby into the scene of the crime! Drita starts crying to Carla and our heart goes out to her. She might act tough as nails, but that kind of news would make any woman lose it.Like Drita says, Lee is a lucky m***** f***** that she found out while he was in jail. Carla than drops a bomb that her husband Joe cheated on her also.  We can take a poll around America and they would find comfort with many, many other women who can relate.

Drita wastes no time and meets with a divorce attorney.  She’s preparing on serving Lee with the papers while hes in jail asap and hoping he doesn’t try and fight her on it. Carla gets a visit from her friend Eleanor, and she tells her how Joe brought up the possibility of living in her house which is not appealing to Carla.

Drita calls all the women to arrange a girls’ night out with the hopes of clearing the air once and for all. Why do we feel like that is not going to happen? The women get dolled up and head out for a night to remember. While the women wait for Drita to show up, the other women speculate on why she called this gathering. Drita says she only has issues with Karen, but she wants Carla and Renee there. Drita wastes no time ripping into Karen and telling her exactly what’s on her mind.

The two women go over the “timeline” of this entire Lee saga, and the conversation goes from 0 to 10 fast. There seems to be a large disprepency between whether or not Karen and Drita were friends when Lee and Drita started hooking up. Karen then reveals that she was cheating on Lee for ‘a very long time’, as if it was nothing. This is just adding to Drita’s argument that Karen and Lee weren’t as serious as she likes to believe. Renee is on fire tonight with the comments, and tries to understand why anyone cares about a timeline. Our point exactly.  If someone tried to hook up with Junior, they would have a serious issue on their hands.

Karen and Drita continue to argue about Lee. Karen mentioning that she was cheating on Lee for basically their entire relationship isn’t making her look like an angel. The two women are getting red in the face and veins are starting to pop. When Drita says that Karen allegedly slept with her boyfriend while she was with Lee, the two women go off and all hell breaks loose.

Next thing we know Drita’s ten feet in the air flying across Renee and right to Karen. Both women are attacking the daylights out of each other. Hair pulling, hitting, kicking, all while Renee and her spanx are caught directly in the middle. Way to end on a high note ladies, we’re not sure we can wait until next season.

Photo credit: Celebrityrumormill

World, Let’s Join Khloe In Asking Kris To Stop Emasculating Bruce

Keeping up with the Kardashians: Season 6: Episode 3: “The Former Mrs. Jenner”

We start out with Kim and Kourtney Kardashian at a pilates workout where Kourtney wants to target her “mom ass”. The pint size beauty and Kim both look amazing in, of course, full hair and make up at the gym. Only in Hollywood. The sisters feel the burn and drop the F bomb about 5 times in the first minute of the episode. Beauty is pain.

Then the whole Kardashian clan spends some quality time at the Redbook red carpet event.  On the carpet, Michael Yo “accidentally” refers to Kris Jenner as Kardashian.  Michael works for E! and suddenly this feels staged.  This question gives Kris the perfect chance to admit that she gets called Kardashian, her ex-husband’s last name, all the time. But it’s okay because it gets her better restaurant reservations.

Kim then calls Khloe to complain about the nonstop rumors about her famous rear end. The trio of sisters google “Kim Butt Implants”, and have a good laugh about a story that claims Kim’s left butt cheek implant exploded on a flight from New Jersey to LA.  Leave it to Khloe to suggest that Kim gets a butt x-ray to put the rumors to rest. Kourtney thinks it’s a great idea, and is very excited, even though you probably can’t tell because of her monotone voice.

Kris, Kim, and Kendall Jenner, go for a brisk walk to get some exercise and catch up. Kris then tells the girls she’s thinking of changing her name from Jenner back to Kardashian. Talk about a slap in the face. Poor Bruce. For some reason E! cut out the clop that probably made people want to tune in in the first place, with Kendall asking her mother, “how can you disrespect my dad like that”?  But Kendall did offer up how her father shakes his head in disbelief when Kris refers to herself as Kardashian on the phone in his presence.  And a child shall lead them.  Kim tells her mom she walked away from that name 12 years ago when she divorced her father and then remarried another man!

Khloe and Kourtney have a quick lunch together and speculate about Kim’s honesty regarding to her famous butt. Khloe bibles that she thinks Kim could have gotten a butt impant while she was away on one of her many trips. Kourtney indulges the idea for a hot second but knows Kim would never do that. Clearly both sisters think know Kim’s assets are real, but it does look like fun to mess with her. The two call Kim and arrange a meeting with the doctor to get the x-ray done.

Bruce finally mans up and confronts Kris about her potential name change and is not happy about it. Kris claims its just about business and about building the brand. But a married woman taking her ex husband’s name back is more than just about business, it’s also wrong . Team Bruce!  At some point, Kris needs to give Bruce his cajones back and stop walking over him.

Next, Khloe meets up with Bruce so he can teach her the most important thing in the world, how to swing a golf club. The conversation quickly moves to Bruce expressing his annoyance with Kris’ idea of changing her name back. Khloe is on the same page as him and is not a fan. Khloe calls her mom a “fame whore”, and pushes Bruce to voice his feelings and stand up to Kris.  She finally mutters the word that has to be on everyone’s minds, emasculating.  Kris is emasculating in ever way.  Khloe looks great in her 5 inch heels, and actually manages to hit the ball, which she admits she would be better at if the balls were black.  Not a funny joke.  We already know she likes “the brothers” and married one.  Enough already.

Khloe heads right over to her mom’s house and gives her a verbal smackdown about changing her name back to Kardashian. She reminds Kris that it’s not about the brand, and she needs to think about Bruce and how he feels. Khloe calls Kris out for not showing Bruce enough love, and points out that there are virtually no pictures of Bruce anywhere in their house.

Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe head off to the doctor to prove to the world that Kim’s butt is God-given. The trio visit their family physician, who turns bright red around the three beauties. Someone’s a little nervous.  The girls take a look at Kourtney’s breast x-ray first to see what an implant would look like. Kim’s butt x-ray proves to everyone that her famous curves are 100% natural. The girls head home to show the results to the whole fam, and they don’t just stop there. Khloe puts the pictures up on her blog so the world can leave her alone! Life is so tough for the Kardashian girls.

Kris then gives a heartfelt toast to Bruce and apologizes for thinking about changing her name back and presents him with a big framed picture of himself to be put on the wall of Kardashian family photos. Bruce had the biggest smile on his face, it almost brought a tear to our eye.

So Kim’s butt is real and the Jenner name will carry on, a successful week for the Kardashian clan!  Now if only Khloe can stop fighting Bruce’s battles!

The Middle Child

Audrina: Season 1: Episode 10

Last week, we left off in the middle of Corey and Audrina‘s breakup/makeup talk.  They haven’t decided which way it’s going to go.  Audrina doesn’t know what to do.  This is the first time she’s seen Corey normal in a long time.  Corey says Audrina has done some f***ed up stuff lately.  “The whole weekend [Audrian was in Florida] sucked,” he said.  Audrina was completely numb.  “Everything I used to have for him is dead,” she said in a confessional.  She tells Corey she guesses it’s over since that’s what he wants.  With that, Corey puts his hat to the back and bounces.  On his way out, he gives the camera the bird, which is metaphorical for flipping Audrina, and her whole reality TV existence off.

After the break, Audrina is an emotional wreck.  She throws her emotion into her sister’s 16 year old birthday party.  Samantha has no idea of the surprise she has in store.  She thinks she’s going to a barbecue.  Audrina and Samantha start discussing the biggest thing that happens in any 16 year olds life- driving.  Samantha has already turned her car requests into her dad.  Samantha has to be the most laid back teenage ever.  Living in LA, we have a lot of laid back teens so that says something.  She totally took after her father.  We wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t flinch at her surprise.  As she pulls up to the house, Samantha says, “what.the.heck.is.this?”  She does light up at the sight of all of her friends at her house and a band, Iration, there to surprise her.

Meanwhile, Audrina starts to wonder where Casey is.  It’s her anniversary weekend, but she could’ve called or something!  Next thing you know, Samantha’s other surprise pulls up.  It’s a silver Mercedes convertible.  Casey who? Do we really want her and the innate controversy to come?

Casey and Kyle finally show up, hours late.  “I just put it in God’s hands,” Casey says of the tormenting decision whether or not to attend her baby sister’s 16th birthday party.  Lynn feels “an emotional freeze” when she sees Kyle and Casey walk in.  Casey is acting weird, or as we’d like to call it, like herself.  Audrina says Casey never walks up to anyone to say hi.  Everyone always has to walk up to her, bow down, and throw gold at her feet praising her for showing up.  Lynn approaches Casey and gives her a kiss.  And the world keeps spinning!

Lynn tells Casey and Kyle she’s glad they came.  Casey points out that her mom’s greeting was fake.  Kyle “wants our kids to be able to hang out with their grandparents and stuff, but if grandparents aren’t being grandparents, then being a good parent is keeping our kids away from that disaster.”

Audrina goes to comfort that disaster.  She tells her mom she did the right thing taking the high road.  Lynn tells Audrina that she knows how it is with those two.  Audrina nods.  She definitely knows how it is.  Lynn thinks they would be okay if not for one pesky little thing, Kyle.  “I just think we need to get rid of the little loser.  Get some raid; he’s a roach.  I wanna zap him,” Lynn adds.     

Audrina clearly had the upper hand in her relationship.  She doesn’t seem bothered by the breakup too much.  Either that or her family is great medicine.

The family dresses up in Jamaican costumes and poses for a family photo.  Lynn is thrilled to have her daughter back, if only for a few hours.  Casey makes sure to bring the roach into the photo.  Lynn cringes briefly, but womans up and smiles for the photo.

The biggest question is whether this show will return for a second season?

Prison ‘Wives

Mob Wives Season 1: Episode 9: “Take this Book and Shove it”

As if watching Drita attempt to “pop” raccoons with a paint gun last week wasn’t amusing enough, Mob Wives continues to provide us with nonstop entertainment.

This week starts off with Carla, and her adorable 2 kids, getting ready to pick up her husband Joe from prison, after 6 years of being incarcerated. The kids are extremely excited to see their father, who they think has been away on a “work trip” for the past 6 years.  They must think their daddy has some really important work if it requires him to be away for nearly a decade. Carla think it is Joe’s responsibility to tell them where he’s been, and worries about their reaction.

We then move on to Renee who’s having lunch with her former boss Tiffany.  Renee used to work as a wardrobe stylist for Tiffany. Renee says her first client was 50 cent and G-g-g-g-Unit. She gave up her job as a stylist when her husband Junior was arrested.  More important things called. At lunch, Renee asks Tiffany for her job back, but Tiffany is apprehensive because of Renee’s “drama queen” attitude. Renee seems to have a very difficult time accepting the fact that she is a drama queen. Maybe Renee should rewatch some of the previous episodes of Mob Wives.

Carla calls Drita on the way back from picking Joe up from prison.  Drita reminisces about when she picked up her husband Lee from prison after his first sentence. Leave it to Drita to have a heartfelt moment which we will never get the full jest of considering every other word was bleeped out.  And this is why we love her.

Karen goes over to Renee’s house to discuss her situation with her ex-husband Junior. Junior promised Renee he was going to make an effort in he and Renee’s relationship. Shortly after, she caught him with text messages from two girls he had been dating. Clearly this didn’t sit well with Renee and she was not going to put up with it. Renee is fed up with Junior’s lying, and is clearly fuming at his manipulative ways. Karen and the other girls tried telling her in the last episode that she was not going to change him, or get what she wanted out of him, but Renee gave it one more shot. After Junior’s sleezy antics, she is finally done. Thank god!

Carla and Joe finally tell their kids where Joe was for the past 6 years, which was far from a “work trip”. As a mandatory rule for being let out of prison, Joe is required to be taken to a half way house. Carla’s young children get very upset because they only got a few hours with their father and then he was taken away again. Really brings a tear to your eye doesn’t it?

Next, Drita and Karen go out for drinks to discuss Karen’s future plans for her life. She tells Drita how she felt out of place when she first came back and joined the other girls. With all these strong personalities who can blame her? Drita tells Karen to stay, in spite of all of their previous beef over Drita’s husband Lee. Now all the issues are put behind them, and they are BFFs again.

Renee visits her therapist and gets out a well-deserved venting session about Junior. Even through all of Renee’s drama, we still can’t help but feel sorry for her. Good for her for leaving Junior. Hopefully she stays strong and sticks to her decision.

Drita and Carla take a trip to the gym to work on their “guns”. Carla talks about how weird it is having Joe back, which causes Drita to reminisce about when Lee first came home from prison. Leave it to Carla and Drita to work out in full make-up and perfect hair. Drita talks about how devastating it was for her and her children when Lee was taken back to prison for a second time.  That doesn’t sound fun.

Later, Renee takes her son AJ out to dinner, and shockingly admits that she at one point wanted her son to follow in her father’s footsteps.. really Renee? Thankfully, she now says she is doing everything in her power to make sure he does exactly the opposite. Phew. She tells him he needs to go to college, and get away from this lifestyle. Her son seems to have a good head on his shoulders!

Then, Drita and Karen meet for lunch to discuss Karen’s new book she’s writing. Everything happens during meals on every single reality show.  Karen has only finished the first chapter, but doesn’t hesitate to show Drita, but the book doesn’t sit well with her. Drita made it very clear that she does not want Lee’s name mentioned in her book.  It looks like another brawl is in the making.

Renee then receives a phone call from Ghostface Killah whom she refers to as “Ghost”. Oh here, Renee, let me pick up that name you dropped.  Renee wants you to know she’s on a nickname basis with the rapper.  Ghost, if we can call him that, hires her to be the stylist for his new video and Renee could not be more excited. With money being a little tighter at home, she can’t wait to get back to work. Renee goes out for her first day back as a stylist, but not before a phone call from her friend Nicole, who commends Renee for getting Junior out of her life. Word about the split is spreading like wildfire so she better stick to it.

Drita and her daughter Alleah receive a phone call from Lee, which starts out as him helping her with her homework, but quickly turns to a life lesson about being a “rat”. Alleah asks Lee when he’s coming home, which is something Drita doesn’t even know. Hearing Lee not be able to tell his family when he will be coming home is heartbreaking.

After Junior “doing Renee dirty” one too many times, she finally packs up his things and moves him out of her house. Karen tries to reach Drita to hear her feedback about the chapter, but continues to have no response. Carla and Drita meet for lunch, and Drita is clearly stressed out. Drita reveals she never even read the chapter, because she fears she will see something she doesn’t want to. Drita knows Karen most likely put Lee in the book, and Drita is not happy about it. Drita then questions why Karen even gave her the copy of the chapter in the first place. Drita makes it clear she does not care about Lee and some girl he “banged” twenty years ago. All she cares about is her husband and her kids. Given her trepidation with reading the chapter, she clearly cares about Lee.  All we know is we would not want to mess with Drita. If Karen attacks Drita, Drita will go to war, and it won’t be pretty.

Until next week…

Photo credit: Vh1

Unwelcome Guest

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Season 6: Episode 2: “Kim Becomes a Stage Mom”

This week’s episode starts out with Khloe visiting an acupuncture specialist, with Kim along for moral support. The treatment doesn’t seem to work, but so what.  It was a chance for us to hear more “dolls”, “Bibles”, and see Khloe cringe having needles stuck in her face.

We move on to keep up with the Jenners.  Kendall Jenner has been modeling for a little over a year now. With her height and looks, she should be. She is killing it at a photo shoot, and is told she really should consider doing runway.

Kris Jenner unsurprisingly shows up to Kourtney and Scott’s house not only unannounced, but with her own set of keys to their home. Scott’s irritation is clear, but Kris continues to point out all of the dangerous aspects of their house that need to be child proofed for their son, Mason. But look, Kris.  Scott has child proofed the electrical sockets!  That counts for something, right?  Wrong.  The doors are easily assessable meaning Mason can get outside where there’s a large pool.  Disaster waiting to happen!  Kris compares Mason to a dead frog they find in the pool.

Kim takes a trip back to the Jenner house to look at Kendall’s pictures from her latest photo shoot. Kim agrees to take Kendall to New York to introduce her to the to Fashion World. Who wouldn’t want to be mentored by Kim Kardashian?  Kendall’s all in.

Later, Scott tells Kourtney she needs to get her key back from Kris.  He doesn’t want his mother in law barging in.  We know he loves walking around in the buff.  Kourtney tells her mom she needs to give her key to a mover who’s coming when Kourtney goes out of town.  A total lie, but it worked. Kris handed over the key with virtually no apprehension.

Kim and Kendall jet off to take New York, while Khloe and Lamar attempt to make some changes in their house. Who knew flipping a mattress could be so amusing.  And it wouldn’t be a Kardashian moment without a lewd remark, this one courtesy of Rob.

In New York, Kim makes it a point to show Kendall the hard side of modeling. This trip is for business and not a vacation. While Kendall’s only 15, Kim has a point.  If not for modeling, Kendall would be at school learning about the Pythagorean Theorem.  Suddenly modeling doesn’t sound so bad.

Kendall and Kim arrive at the photo shoot, and Kendall looks uhhmazing! Kim looks like the proudest sister in the world watching Kendall take picture after picture. A lady asks Kendall to do a small runway shoot, and before Kendall can say no, Kim says yes.  Kendall is shaking like a leaf.  She can pose for photos in front of 14 gazing eyes, but she can’t walk the catwalk in front of hundreds of eyes.

Kim thought this trip was going to be all about Kendall.  But she finds a way to make it all about Kim, because it’s always all about Kim.  Kim’s boyfriend, cough cough we mean fiance, Kris Humphriesshows up for a visit while they’re in New York. Now we know why Kim was so quick to volunteer to take Kendall to New York.

Mama Kris is really trying everyone’s patience this season. She shows up once again unannounced to Kourtney and Scott’s, and Scott is not happy about it. Kris overreacts about them not wanting her to have a copy of their house keys.

Kim and Kendall go meet with a runway coach Kim hired, and once again Kendall shines and shows us that she was born to be a star. But as any typical fifteen year old, Kendall begins to act out during the session, and storms out. Kim is left to pick up the pieces and deal with the runway coach. The sisters begin to argue, and Kendall accuses Kim of living her dream of doing runway through her. Kendall continues to dismiss Kim, and wants to go back to LA.

We then head back to the Jenner house, where Kris is venting to Kylie and Khloe about Scott and Kourtney not wanting her having the key to their house. Which by the way, is completely normal, but for the Kardashian family, normalcy doesn’t exist.  We can see the family matriarch having keys to everyone’s homes in case of an emergency, but Kris uses the keys on a daily basis.  She doesn’t even bother to knock before she sticks a key into someone else’s house.  We could see if her daughter’s were single, but they’re married or shacked up.

Bruce confronts Kim for pushing Kendall into runway modeling, but Kim continues to defend her actions. Clearly Kim wants the best for Kendall. Kim sits down with Kendall and the two make up after Kim tells Kendall she was just trying to help her with her career.

The final loose end is tied when Kris makes a trip to Kourtney and Scott’s and thankfully returns their house keys.  All of them. So Scott and Kourtney can take a deep breath and relax, now Kris will only stop by every other day.

Photo credits: E! Online

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